Title: Pusher Reviewed by Gizzie part of Gizzie's Deli on EP Author: gizzie@ix.netcom.com copyright 1998-2000 URL:http://home.i1.net/~bakke/deli/ OR http://home.stlnet.com/~bakke/deli
Archive: Archive anywhere as long this header is attached.
Disclaimer: The X-Files and its characters, is the property of Chris Carter, TenThirteen Productions, and Twentieth Century Fox. No copyright infringement intended. Any similarity to characters, alive or dead, or situations is purely coincidental and nintentional.

In <19970313133101.IAA00710@ladder01.news.aol.com> gravespa2@aol.com (GravesPA2) writes:
Gizzie, you're an international treasure... please, give us more!>> Yes indeedy! Give us more synopses---and could you come up with a "Messenger III" while you're at it? Yeah, yeah, it's COMIN' already, but nobody dies or cries, so put your angst towel away... Hmm...let me issue a challenge....let's see you Gizzify Irresistible.. or Anasazi...or Pusher...or my new favorite, Paper Hearts...or my old favorite One Breath...take ya pick! Geez, that's all MY choices, too.....Ummmmmm.......I'll take "Pusher" for 300, please, Paula.......

Pusher

Some guy is arrested by the FBI for laughing at the headlines on the National Star Globe News, but he fixes THEIR asses when he makes them hallucinate that an oncoming truck is NOT THERE, and they didn't even drink the mango-papya stuff, and the driver gets squished, but the guy escapes, and the OTHER FBI guy, who's name is "Burst", and I laughed so hard at that, I snarfled Pee-pop out my nose, anyway, Burst tells M&S that this "Pusher" (Push--apush, apush--they call him the Pusher) confessed that HE actually MADE a bunch of people kill themselves, this guy MAKES people DO stuff, he just DOES, cause it's FUN to be BAD.

In another incredible leap of logic, and "if you believe this, you'll believe anything" scripting, Mulder just HAPPENS to connect a magazine ad to mystical, magical brain tricks, and pulls a phone number from the ad, and he and Scully go to stake out the phone booth, but she wimps out and AWWWWWW falls asleep on his shoulder and DROOLS on him, so cute, and he gently, tenderly caresses her face with his thumb, and pushes the hair back from her forehead "SLAAPP!"

Oh, sorry, I had a fanfic moment, there.....so they get this call from Pusher and he says "nyeh-nyeh, I can make you do stuff without saying 'mother, may I?' ", then he makes some OTHER guy set himself on fire, and he tells Mulder "Betcha five bucks I get off"..... and Mulder says "Oh, yeah, watch ME get off", and he grabs Scully, and PUSHES himself...no, he didn't, I made that up :)

Sooooooo.....the judge, PUSHed himself, lets Model go, and he goes to the FBI, makes poor, sweet little Holly kick Skinner's ass , but GOOD, and gets some info on Mulder. Mulder figures this guy either has a brain tumor that gives him these "pushing" powers, or Skinner's Marine stories are all bullshit. Pusher calls and gets Burst on the line, and now we find out WHY this is his name, as Pusher talks him into a coronary. He WANTS Mulder, now, and they follow him to a hospital....

Mulder puts on really cool surveilance stuff, while Scully, ditched again, sits and looks VERY undone (why does HE always get to wear the cool stuff??)...Mulder kneels and gives her his gun and she lays her hand on his, and we sigh, and he is TOO sexy in that kevlar vest, Scully wants that camera ON HIM, but we see where he is going,and see dead guards, and see LOOKIE HERE, Model DOES have a brain tumor, then we see AAUUGGGHHHHHH, IT'S HIM!!!! and he RIPS the camera from Mulder's head, see what happens when you don't pay that cable bill?, and Scully rushes in, and finds them, boys will be boys, playing Russian Roulette. Scully tries to talk to Mulder as he points at Model, then Click-click!!! HIMSELF!!, and St Scully SWEARS at Model, and Mulder turns the gun on HER, and she drops a crystaline tear and pleads with Mulder to be strong, even as he implores her to get the HELL out of here, cos he knows he's a crazy bastard, and Scully runs and pulls the fire alarm, and Mulder blows Modell right out of the chair, and JUST keeps firing that empty gun, and Scully quietly approaches him and he hands her the gun, and we want him to cry, but he doesn't.

Modell is wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a sterile bed, will he ever return, no, he'll never return, and M&S come to gaze upon him and wax guiltily over the little man that wanted to be big, and Scully takes Mulder's hand and he squeezes her fingers and we swoon and they go to her apartment and boff their brains out (but they cut that part) ********************

Coming this summer, to a newsgroup near YOU...."The Xworld According to giz"...an episode or two a week, to get us through those long reruns.....betcha can't wait....(just don't ask me to do my favorite "Jose."

Gads, the pictures in this Third Season guide SUCK

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXgizzieXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"I need to find a fish who can accept my deep chocolate layer" Jack "One Fine Day"